A reader sent me an Instagram message this weekend saying, “You’re like Wonder Woman, I don’t know how you do it all!”
On the surface it’s super flattering. I’ve been hustling (ok, killing myself) the past month or so. Nearly two weeks abroad, birthday parties for both kids, a conference in California and two jobs around the holiday season can really push a woman overboard.
This doesn’t even include the nuts amount of stuff every woman and mom is required to keep in her brain at all times that let’s be honest, no man ever even gives two seconds to thinking about. He doesn’t give two seconds to it because he doesn’t even know these insane to-do lists, errands and things need to happen.
Women can stay up all night trying to check off items in her head. Men are just there snoring.
So, when this insanely kind reader made this beautiful comment, I said thank you — as you should do when someone pays you a compliment — but it kind of hurt my heart.
It hurt my heart because I feel like I’m failing in ways that are more important.
I have either nearly forgotten or not had a chance to call some of my closest friends for their birthdays the past few weeks. And, I down-right blanked on someone’s birthday who I love and feel grateful for each day. Praise the lord for Facebook reminders but even Facebook couldn’t save me this time.
When I look back on my life I know it’s going to be the relationships that matter most. Not an extra blog post, not a work assignment and not the Frozen decor I knew my son would love for his 4th birthday. Heck, that party was a week ago and he didn’t even notice Elsa and Anna beneath his pizza while the party was happening.
The point is, I’m not Wonder Woman and I realize there’s something really dangerous about social media and the ways we consciously — and often subconsciously — present our lives.
I’m really proud of all that I do accomplish, for my family, for my friends, and for work. But amidst the successes and memory making and inherent chaos of life, there are absolutely times we all know we failed.
It’s OK to admit that and not feel compelled to only show one glimpse of our lives.
I can only apologize to people that matter most. That’s all we can do when we realize we f’up.
We’re human. We move forward and continue to demonstrate the greater part of beings that fiercely care about those closest to us.
Just remember that apologizing is not where it ends.
When something happens once, it can be a fluke but when it keeps happening it’s when you need to come to grips with reality, take a step back, pause, and reflect.
This time of year is only going to get more nuts, if you let it.
Think about how you can slow down. Think about how you can get off the roller coaster. Where you might need to say no in order to preserve what really matters most.
I’m not Wonder Woman — nor am I trying to be.
But I am working each day to be a stronger, more loving, kind and present version of myself.