Friends, readers and just random people all the time are often a little in shock when I tell them about my blog, i.e. my “side hustle,” “second job” or “passion project.” Whatever you want to call it, having a second job or interest beyond any full-time job, and/or parenting can be intense and feel unrealistic for many.
It takes real determination to keep doing that thing you’re passionate about after your first/official work day is over (for many, that can also mean raising your children full-time… never a break there).
But you can do it.
You just have to be honest with yourself.
I’ve written before about ways to create more time, and I’ve told you why having more time for you is important.
This isn’t that.
So many women have either side hustle or a dream of something they want to do… and don’t do it.
Do you know what they have plenty of?
(Sorry if that’s a little harsh; I only speak the truth around these parts).
Many of the excuses come in the form of lack of time. Others come in the form of other human beings who require your attention. Sometimes your first job is utterly demanding and draining.
All are fairly valid, and preach sister because all of the above have come out of my mouth, too. If I’m being honest though, they’re all excuses that make you feel comfortable not doing the thing you so want to do.
Why? Because maybe you think you’ll fail. So maybe it’s easier if you never try.
There, I said it. There’s a decent chance you rather not try than fail.
Because then it’s still a possibility you can make it happen.
If whatever your dream, goal, vision, goal side hustle is… if it is reeealllllyyyy that important to you, then you’d make the time.
We all make time for things that are important to us.
(and somehow we all magically find plenty of time to aimlessly scroll our Facebook and Instagram feeds).
So here’s what I suggest.
I’m going to say this one again: Be honest with yourself. Sit in a quiet room and really, really look inward about what you want. Not about what your friends want or think, and not what someone else might think is crazy or weird. Is it your dream?
Speak with authority and passion and people will take you seriously. And if not, forget them.
You have bigger things to accomplish! Nobody has the time for negativity (and those who might be keeping you down).
Next, prioritize. Don’t tell me you’re too busy but you are more up on the latest crazy in the Real Housewives franchise than Andy Cohen. You are then not that busy.
When you prioritize, recognize something has got to give. Either it’s going to be your dream or a few girls nights out, or a volunteer commitment or whatever else. You can’t have and do it all, at least at the same time.
So don’t over commit. It’s a recipe for disaster, and you are then pushing your side hustle…. way too far too the side. When you only see two blog posts here in a week it’s basically because I over-committed in other areas of my life. Sometimes that’s reality because it’s a more insane week than usual — someone gets sick, a million evening work commitments, etc — so I limit what I say yes to.
Remember, when you say no to one thing, it really means you’re saying yes to something else.
And when I am talking about priorities, the first and most important (after you): family.
You can never go back in time. An older client told me yesterday he regretted how much he was working when his children were younger. Those years are fleeting, whether it’s with children, whether it’s with your boyfriend or husband or partner, even simply your health and stamina. You never want to look back on your life and think, I wish I spent more time with the ones who mattered most. And, you never want to look back and think, I wish I had really believed in myself enough to go fearlessly face first into making my passion and side hustle my main gig.
So if you are committing the time to make it happen, here’s the three things you need to do: set goals, WRITE THEM DOWN, seriously, WRITE THEM DOWN, and then assign yourself deadlines. WRITE THE DEADLINES DOWN. That’s it.
You got this girl. I believe in you with everything I have and still, no one will ever believe in you more than you have the power to believe in yourself. Never forget that.