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Why It’s Time for Women to Support Women (Why is This So Hard?)

How Can Women Support Each Other (and why do we have such a hard time doing so?!) // the modern savvy

My success does not diminish yours.

It really doesn’t. There’s room for all of us.

There’s room for all of us because my success is different, and will be different, than yours.

Because my goals are different than yours.

And, most importantly, because there is room for each of us to shine.

Yet it feels like so many women don’t feel that way, that enough women don’t support each other in authentic, meaningful and honest ways.

Here’s a not-so-secret secret…

We can all rise together.

Actually, we will all rise together when we support and lift each other.

You know the expression, “a candle doesn’t lose anything by lighting another candle?” It’s the truth.

 

Why does this happen?

Is it jealousy?

Do we feel like there’s not enough room for all of us?

Is it insecurity peeking out?

 

I feel passionate about helping women rise, about supporting and encouraging women, whether that means in the workplace or simply, helping women seek out their joy and reach their goals. Cheesy but true.

I’ve had a lot of jobs in my day, as an intern, a marketing and program coordinator, some other jobs, and now a business owner, I’ve seen the power of another woman offering to mentor me and lift me up… and the detriment of hurtful or mean colleagues or bosses. I take intense pride in my role now as a boss. At the same time, if I’m being honest, it’s likely that somewhere along my journey, in a moment of weakness or insecurity, I did or said something hurtful. I absolutely regret it.

We can only try to do better.

Each day we make a choice about how we are going to act, and how we are going to treat others.

I love seeing when a woman compliments and support another. It shows her strength as much as shines a deserving light.

Whether it’s congratulating a professional victory or milestone, or an outfit, it all matters.

 

“You can always tell who the strong women are.

They’re the ones building one another up instead of tearing each other down.”

 

So why is it so difficult for women?

Why is it so difficult to wish someone the best when they land a new client? When they win a tennis tournament? Or get their jewelry into a new boutique? When they make a major sale? Or get a promotion?

(Let’s not get into the fact that women often don’t boast enough about their successes. We can be our own worst critics. Ladies. If you’re doing amazing stuff out there, your real friends want to know… and want to celebrate you. Swear. You’re not gloating. It’s pride. And you should be proud. If they don’t want to hear it, you can guess what that means about them.)

 

“Behind every success woman is a tribe of other successful women have her back.”

 

Let’s stop the snarky comments, the office politics, the gossip that hurts or tears down others, and the back-handed compliments that only dig.

Each of us are powerful, kind, compassionate and capable-of-everything women.

It’s time to lift.

It’s time to exert kindness.

It’s to compliment, congratulate and feel honest pride when a friend or another woman kicks some ass.

If anything, let it serve as a kick in your ass that you’re equally capable of magnificence.

 

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Join the Conversation

  • Reply
    Nathalie
    July 10, 2017 at 5:41 AM

    I love this post. I agree that women need to support women more. Thanks for this reminder.

    Nathalie
    http://www.nathalie-alexandra.blogpost.com

    • Reply
      Alyson
      July 11, 2017 at 4:56 PM

      Absolutely. There’s so much power that can come from women supporting women.

  • Reply
    Stacy
    July 7, 2017 at 12:27 PM

    Alyson — I simply love, love this post and congratulate you for taking the time and heart to write and share it! I plan to share it and even read it again. Happy to light your candle any day!

    • Reply
      Alyson
      July 11, 2017 at 4:55 PM

      You’re the best, STacy. Thank you so much for reading and sharing it with your amazing group of women. Happy to light your candle as well! πŸ™‚

  • Reply
    Stephanie
    July 7, 2017 at 11:47 AM

    THis is so important!! We really should be cheering each other on! I am one who has not talked about my successes to friends and family because I feel like it is gloating.

    • Reply
      Alyson
      July 11, 2017 at 4:55 PM

      Promise you it’s not gloating, Stephanie. Totally believe your friends WANT to hear about your achievements. They love you and want to celebrate you; I know I feel that way about my friends! Promise you… and if not, 1. I’m happy to cheer you on!

  • Reply
    Dana
    July 7, 2017 at 11:14 AM

    Amen Alison!! I completely am on the same page as you!!

    • Reply
      Alyson
      July 11, 2017 at 4:54 PM

      YES! Thank you so much for reading, Dana!

  • Reply
    Shira
    July 7, 2017 at 10:52 AM

    Yes yes yesssssss! I never understood the competitiveness and bitchiness. I

    • Reply
      Alyson
      July 11, 2017 at 4:54 PM

      Me neither… I just don’t get it, ESPECIALLY when it’s women in different industries. That boggles my mind.

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